the gift of an ambulance ride to the ER

and, what it has to do with a rose 🌹

Until rather recently, I didn’t realize how much roses have been a part of my life.

I’ve always said that sunflowers were my favorite flower.

It turns out, it’s a soul thing….

and, it’s roses🌹

When I really sat down and thought about it, they’ve always been there.

My favorite type of wood?

Rose wood.

My favorite type of crystal?

Rose quartz.

My favorite flowers to doodle?

Roses.

My favorite Golden Girl?

Rose.

My favorite Sunday during Advent?

Rose Sunday.

My favorite gold?

Rose.

Our wedding flowers?

Roses.

My Dad’s funeral flowers?

Roses.

My best friend’s tattoo?

A rose.

My favorite stain glass window in any church?

The Rose Window.

My stationary growing up?

Roses.

Our dream house we moved into 3 years ago?

Knock Out Rose Bushes.

My favorite glasses to look through?

Rose colored, of course😉

It’s almost like they’ve always called to me. But, I didn’t pay attention.

Until now.

When I started studying the sacred feminine mysteries, and I heard the words “rose lineage” and “priestess”, I had a visceral response in my body + soul.

My body felt warm and filled with golden, honey light.

And, my soul?

My soul smiled and said, “She found it.”

What’s so interesting though is my ego-self was not on-board. At first, the whole idea of a “rose lineage,” and the word “priestess” felt so far out.

SO beyond. So woo-woo.

However, my soul?

She felt home.

“The rose has held incredible significance throughout time as a symbol of the Feminine. In fact, it predates the cross as the earliest symbol of mystic Christians or Gnostics.

Encoded within the rose is a pathway for awakening, unfurling, and opening the heart and the way of love as an embodied path of spiritual practice.”

- Mary Magdalene and The Sacred Way of the Rose

Back in January, my studies of sacred feminine spirituality deepened, quickly. I was submerged in all of it and soaked up everything I could. It was a craving that couldn’t be satisfied. My soul couldn’t get enough, and my curious self wanted to figure out what it all meant.

It seemed like over and over again the word “priestess” or “rose” was coming forward in my life.

At one point, I looked at my sister-in-law, Hope, who was visiting in February and said, “Why do I feel like God and my soul are calling me forward to be a priestess? I don’t want to be a priestess?! WTF is a priestess?!”

Which leads me up to my story of being in the back of an ambulance.

Sunday, March 10th, Derek and I were talking, and I burst into tears and told him I feel like I’m meant to do so much more in this world than what I’m doing.

I told him I felt like I was running out of time.

Like I was going to die soon and not live up to my soul’s purpose.

The next day?

I have an anaphylaxis response to either tofu or raw sugar snap peas.

I did everything I could to avoid taking my EpiPen, but by 11:00pm, I had to inject myself, say goodbye to our sleeping children, and go to the hospital.

Unfortunately, Derek forgot his ID (you have to have your military ID to get on post) and we had to turn around. I told Derek I felt like I wasn’t going to make it, and that he needed to call 911.

It was so scary. And, all I could think is, I ran out of time.

As I made my way to the ER in an ambulance, I assumed I would see a military doctor on call.

Right?

Well, no, actually.

I had a civilian doctor.

And, her name?

Dr. Rose.

There are some things you just can’t explain.

There are some things you just can’t rationalize.

There are some things you have to hand over to the mystery of life.

For me, this is that something.

I had a somewhat life-threatening situation happening, and the woman who was going to take care of me was Dr. Rose? In the midst of wondering if I was being called forward to become a priestess of the rose lineage?

I’ve since realized and accepted, The Rose Lineage of the Magdalene’s has actually been calling me my whole life.

My middle of the night ambulance felt like a wake-up call.

A new beginning.

An initiation.

And, we shall see where it all takes me.

Thank you, Rose.

Love, love, love,
Danielle

P.S. About two weeks before my ER trip, we had to change our car insurance policy (teenage drivers!), and when I got our temporary password, it was this:

ROSE? On Progressive? What are the actual f*cking chances of that? I can’t.

P.P.S. Not only was Dr. Rose amazing + took fantastic care of me, she told me that I was so beautiful, and she was so happy to be treating me. 🥲

Currently on my nightstand 📿🌹